As I once said, "Music is a friend to me when I am lonely when I am blue. We just did what we loved and what we felt. We didn’t strut around like mating peacocks, like the Rolling Stones. We didn’t play into fads like the Beatles. Plant: Bad acid trip there, Lennon? You make about as much sense as Yoko.
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The only thing they don’t know how to handle is non-violence and humor." Because once they’ve got you violent, then they know how to handle you. As I once said, "The establishment will irritate you - pull your beard, flick your face - to make you fight. We didn’t need noise or hype to make our music. What can I say? I think it’s evident that the Beatles are the most influential band of all time. But when it comes to rock and roll, Zeppelin had more volume and complexity than both of you amateurs! We had a mysticism that transcends the ages! Plus, I had better hair!
And we had the most fans of any rock band ever. So get it straight, the Stones had more swagger than both of you two ladies, and we got more ladies than both of you two ladies. Jagger: You’d be more likely to win Sympathy for the Devil. Imagine.Īnd just so you know, the Beatles had more number-one hits than both of you combined! We were bigger than Jesus Christ…isn’t that right, JC? Up here, there’s no need for technology, and it’s glorious. See I went to the London School of Economics. Lennon: Phonograph? Where have you been, hanging with John Bonham? It’s all about CDs, man. Listening to them is like hearing myself on the phonograph. The White Strips and Greta Van Fleet, who incidentally should send me a royalty check every time they perform, ripped me off so completely. We were the pioneers of hard rock and heavy metal! We created masterpieces like Stairway to Heaven, Kashmir, and Whole Lotta Love. Led Zepplin is as relevant today as in 1969. Jagger, the self-declared King, and Lennon, Yoko’s Queen. Plant: Ha ha ha! Look at you two, the self-professed monarchy of rock. Whereas Keith and I, well, we’re still buds, when he’s sober at least. You broke up because you couldn’t stand each other, just like I can’t stand you. You lost touch with your roots and your fans. You were all so busy trying to be clever and artsy that you forgot how to rock. I Can’t Get No Satisfaction from songs like I Want to Hold Your Hand. Jagger: Oh please, you were just pretentious pop stars who got lucky with some catchy tunes. Google Plagiarism Led Zepplin, if you don’t believe me. You just copied what we did, and Robert, you copied just about every band that ever opened for you. We were the first to make concept albums like Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.
The first to experiment with different genres and styles and use studio techniques like tape loops and backward recording. Lennon: Come on now, you two are just imitators of the Beatles, weren’t you really? I mean, no comparison. We amazed millions of people around the world with our technical skills, me with the most distinguishable voice in all of rock and Jimmy with his landmark guitar work. We rocked louder than anyone with our heavy metal sound and epic songs, writing about fantasy, mythology, magic, and mysticism. Plant: Greetings, I’m Robert Plant, the singer of Led Zeppelin, the most powerful band in history. We rocked harder than anyone else with our bluesy riffs, catchy hooks, and sneering attitude, singing about sex, drugs, and rebellion.
Jagger: Let it be, will you John? As every human on the planet knows, I am Mick Jagger, the frontman of the legendary Rolling Stones. We opened the door for all rock musicians who came after us, even posers like the Rolling Stones and Led Zepplin. We sang about love, peace, politics, and spirituality. The Beatles changed music forever with innovative songs and albums. I’m John Lennon, the leader of the most influential band in history.
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